Men, listen up. This guide is for you. It’s provided as a public service to help you with relationships with a person of
the female gender--be she wife, girlfriend, mother, friend or coworker. This insider’s
guide just may save that relationship as you’ll gain a better understanding of
the vagaries of a good cry.
Here’s the deal, men. Women cry. Some cry all the time; some
of us cry once in a while. The flow of tears can be as unpredictable and perplexing
to us womenfolk as it is to you.
Cry Category
|
What This Could
Possibly Mean
|
Your Reaction Could
Save Your Life
|
Misty eyes
|
Cute puppy sighting or touching child’s poem.
|
Ignore altogether, but do not mock.
|
A single tear rolls down her cheek + chin quivers
|
Sappy movie like The
Notebook or the kids won’t go to sleep.
|
Tilt your head toward her and give her a closed-lip smile.
|
Sustained tears +
strangled hiccup
|
Didn’t get job promotion or ongoing feud with sister ends
badly.
|
A long hug, listen, appropriate Uh-huhs, and offers of chocolate.
|
Blubbering + full-on sobs
|
Usually alcohol fueled. Didn’t get into grad school or
lost winning lottery ticket.
|
Sit and commiserate, and then put her into bed.
|
Mouth open + gasping + unable to speak
|
Okay. This isn’t good. Really serious stuff like she admits
to a gambling addiction and has blown your life's savings.
|
Break up and run.
|
There’s one more type of cry that’s beyond categorization. It’s called the Good Cry. Every so often, women feel a need to let out pent-up emotion in the form of a sustained sob-fest. There’s nothing in particular that brings it on. But letting loose with a Good Cry is better than the men’s version – the Dangerous and Recklessly Fast Drive Home.
I ask one thing, men: Please don’t sob and speed.
